If anyone tells me it's "that time of the month" i'll staple their junk to the floor!

apologies in advance to all of my readers about the bitch-fest. perhaps getting this out on paper (screen?) will do a little something to alleviate the yuck feeling i've had all day.

oooookay, here we go. today has been REALLY rough. i honestly have no idea why. actually, i do. what i don't know is why it suddenly kicked into overdrive today. i miss my daughter like hell. i miss michigan. i miss my family, my friends, and mike. i'm sick and tired of being yanked around by the army and made to jump through hoops. i'm tired of NCOs being all nicey-nice to my face, then turning around and doing all they can in their power to make sure that things are as bumpy as possible for my family. i don't have a vehicle right now to just get out of the house for a little while...therefore, i have an insane case of cabin fever going on. i'm tired of never being appreciated around here. a "thank you" now and again for cleaning the house, running errands, taking care of kids, cooking means, etc would be nice. instead, i simply feel taken for granted.

here's the kicker. i ran out of my lunesta (no car to go to the doctor's office for a refill), so i've been taking trazodone again. this was actually made originally as an antidepressant but it made people too sleepy. it's now used only as a sleep aid. seems that they decided to take out the ANTI part. I've heard that can happen, but it's either this or get NO sleep...literally. last time i didn't take my sleep aid, i went for three days without a wink of sleep. naturally, i want my regular sleeping pattern back, but i haven't had that for over half a year. i used to enjoy going to bed...now i just dread laying awake for hours.

ok, i'm done. if you've made it to the end of this, i apologize for the mush your brain has turned into. the venting helped, though! now, excuse me while i go crawl under my big, fluffy blanket for a few millenia.


"When the going gets tough arm yourself with ammo, cowgirl up, and come out with both barrels blazing!"